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Instead, like so many of the sequences involving Ramsay and Reek, the show seems to get a disquieting, dark kick out of the degradation Roose Bolton's bastard can inflict on others. What makes "Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken" the worst Game of Thrones episode of the series, however, is also just about everything else about it.

The trial of Ser Loras Tyrell for "buggery" is such an obvious trap — of course the High Sparrow is going to scrounge up at least one of Loras' louche tricks — that it makes the Tyrells seem willfully stupid, when Margaery and especially the Queen of Thorns have heretofore proven to be anything but. And the fight between Jaime, Bronn, and the Sand Snakes comes off like a second-rate battle at a local Ren Faire, laughably unworthy of everyone involved. Arya and Tyrion's storylines provide some tiny, fleeting glimmers of pleasure — the Hall of Faces!

Tyrion pleading for his penis! Thank the gods the season got so much better. And Missandei, the only woman of color of lasting significance on GoT , could have had some actual scenes before her beheading — perhaps offering Cersei more of her own insight into who Dany truly is, and in turn giving Cersei more to do then tolerate Euron and wait for Dany to kill her.

The third-to-last GoT episode ever felt fundamentally at odds with what we know the show can be at its best, or even at its just-OK. After years of precise character details and careful world building, it all just felt so damn sloppy. No wonder no one noticed that coffee cup.

Instead, as the most exasperating example of how the writers abandoned Dany in the final season — among its many other cardinal sins — it is the second to worst. The previous episodes on this ranking aside, the "bad" GoT episodes are usually the ones that are preoccupied with checking in with all the disparate characters scattered across Westeros and beyond the Narrow Sea, advancing each story barely an inch in the process.

When the show's critics in the early seasons called it a sprawling tangle of too many characters spread far too thin, these are episodes they were talking about. The worst offender of this lot is the second episode of what was otherwise a sterling season. Until they got caught, I found Brienne and Jaime's bantering just annoying. But neither scene can make up for the grind of tiny setups, especially of my two least favorite GoT storylines ever. The second: the senseless captivity and torture of Theon.

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And so it plops with a thud at nearly the bottom of this list. There really is not much more going on here other than sending Brienne off to find Sansa, sending Sansa off with Littlefinger to the Eyrie, sending Jon Snow off to the horrific rape den that's become of Craster's Keep, and sending Bran Stark off to be captured in Craster's Keep. And then there's the White Walker baby-making altar. I'll give points to the show for taking a big swing at explicitly resolving part of the mystery of the White Walkers — namely, what the hell are they doing with those babies?

Martin never has in his books. At least, not yet. But I will take those points right back for the downright wacky way it is executed — it feels as if it is from a different show entirely. Michelle MacLaren has directed some fine hours of television, including two more on this list. This is not one of them. On the other hand: Jaqen H'ghar makes his first kill! When I initially created this ranking, I considered placing this episode in the worst-ever slot, mainly because the only thing I could remember about it was the pointless scene of Dany complaining that she wanted to find her missing dragons — the perfect example of GoT 's early bad habit of needlessly checking in with every single character.

But then I rewatched it, and I realized that amid Theon whining about honor, Jon continuing to trudge through the snow, and Robb courting certain doom by boinking Talisa, there were some fun Tyrion scenes with Bronn, Cersei, and Varys. So: It's just sixth worst! This episode had the unenviable job of introducing a gaggle of new and important characters — including Renly, Varys, Pycelle, and Littlefinger — with little time to dwell on any of them.

It's the ultimate "setup" episode, really This would be a perfectly decent mid-season episode — with some shrewd psychological warfare by Dany against the slavers of Meereen, and another pointed lesson in the Hound's education of Arya in the ways of cynicism and self-preservation — if it wasn't for Jaime's rape of Cersei next to the cold body of their first-born son. First of all, yes, it is rape, despite the wrongheaded assertion by the episode's director that "it becomes consensual by the end.

It just hangs there, ugly and unaddressed, for the rest of the season. Everyone involved should have known better. So many new characters, like the loyal low-born smuggler Davos Seaworth Liam Cunningham and his boring son Matthos Kerr Logan , whose only real qualities are that he worships the Lord of Light and he's, you know, boring.

Meanwhile, Dany and Arya spin their wheels, and Theon unknowingly diddles his grown sister. Well, I mean, he knows he's diddling her — on horseback, no less — but he doesn't know she's his sister until later. As twists go, it's somehow both hilarious and appalling. Lots of busy business involving the Small Council, the Sons of the Harpy, the High Sparrow, and the Waif Faye Marsay hitting Arya in the face — none of it amounting to much more than setup for later episodes.

The main story of the season sllllllllowly begins to kick into gear, as Ned Stark starts investigating the death of Jon Arryn, and Catelyn arrests Tyrion for attempting to murder Bran. Bad move, guys. We also meet poor Samwell, whose fast friendship with Jon Snow gives us our first real peek into just how truly decent a man Ned's bastard really is. But we also have to endure Viserys Targaryen's umpteenth demand for his Dothraki army.

Shaddup already. The second season premiere hits the ground running — may the gods help you if this was the first time you'd tuned in. The secret about Joffrey's parentage that took Ned Stark's head is finally out, courtesy of Stephen Dillane's flinty Stannis Baratheon, and Carice van Houten makes a terrific first impression as the Red Priestess. And it's also fun watching Tyrion march into King's Landing and take command like a boss as the Hand of the King. But like so many early-season GoT episodes, this one suffers from too many characters all scurrying to their starting marks — and the final shot of Arya heading off to Castle Black isn't as powerful a launch into the new season as the episode seems to think it is.

And we get our first glimpse of Dorne, which starts with a lot of uninspired scowling and never gets much better. Watching Jon Snow get elected Lord Commander is a classic GoT moment of don't-celebrate- just -yet triumph, and Brienne's discovery of Sansa gives us our first real understanding of how far afield Season 5 is going to stray from Martin's books. The best moment in the episode, however, is the final scene: a despondent Dany discovers Drogon camping atop Meereen's Great Pyramid, only to rebuff her and fly away.

Don't worry, Dany. He won't be gone forever. Was the fleeting half-second of doubt as Melisandre seemed to fail to resurrect Jon Snow worth the bizarre, year-long PR masquerade that he was genuinely, never-coming-back dead? I would submit: No, it was not. But least we care about all those people. Odd that someone so important had never once been mentioned on the show!

And the more time we spend with the new Lord Bolton, the more he feels like a lesser replacement for the baroque wickedness of the late King Joffrey. Meanwhile, I could watch Tyrion commune with dragons for an entire episode — especially considering that it turned out to be the only great Tyrion scene for almost the entirety of Season 6.

The worst offender was "Eastwatch," which featured a few individually strong moments — Jon meeting Drogon, Ser Davos reuniting with Gendry, Tyrion reuniting with Jaime — but on the whole felt somehow undernourished. But for a show that has luxuriated in the character-building opportunities of long-haul travel, such sudden, rapid storytelling was actively harmful to the emotional impact of these final episodes.

Also: Perhaps it was a good idea to capture and smuggle a wight past the Wall to somehow convince Cersei to join their fight against the White Walkers. However, this episode moved at such a breakneck clip that it effectively made everyone racing into this enormously risky endeavor seem unintentionally dumb. The difference here is that while several of these scenes are interstitial at best — farewell, Melisandre, wherever you're going! Theon is set free and rescued well, so far as we know at the time. There's the hilarious discovery that Tyrion's loyal squire Podrick is so dynamite in the sack that the high-class whores Tyrion purchased for him refuse their payment.

Annnnnnd Jaime is rewarded for rescuing Brienne from rape with the loss of his sword hand. This otherwise just-OK episode — more cryptic Bran dreams! And Margaery Tyrell a perfectly cast Natalie Dormer first reveals herself literally! The tap dancing over whether or not to kill Jaime Lannister gets old fast, and Dany seems like a dunderhead for not concluding immediately that A Xaro can't be trusted, and B the creepy bald wizard s at the House of the Undying have taken her dragons.

Like, duh. Thankfully, Jon Snow's story line finally gets interesting as he strains to fend off Ygritte's aggressive flirtation. And Tywin schools Arya on the art of pretending not to be high born, a delicious scene that allows the great Charles Dance to play something other than terrifying displeasure.

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Theon's fake-out murder of Bran and Rickon Stark, however, is muddled. On the one hand, Alfie Allen is always great in this role even once he becomes Reek , and especially this episode. On the other hand, for a show that has proven unafraid to kill off so many beloved characters, playing these deaths so coyly just makes the fake-out that much more obvious — and mean. This is actually a pretty decent episode. Jon and Ygritte scaling the Wall is one of the show's best visual sequences to date, and there's a great exchange between Tyrion and Cersei about their impending arranged marriages — really, any time these two are on screen together is terrific.

So why is this episode ranked so low? Blame the Boy aka Ramsay, though we don't know that yet and his gleeful torture of Theon. Iwan Rheon and Alfie Allen comport themselves well with what they are given, but torture scenes, especially ones without any clear point, are pretty much the antithesis of genuine drama. Which is probably why George R. Martin waited to depict them until Book 5 of A Song of Ice and Fire — the producers appear to have included them so they could keep Allen around for Season 3.

As is the case with every one of the show's season premieres, there is so much table setting here: Arya, begging and blind in Braavos; Tyrion and Varys, touring the deserted streets and burning fleets of Meereen; and Roose Bolton, ominously reminding his son that his only worth is fathering an heir with Sansa Stark.

Melisandre regards her own ancient true form with a mix of contempt, disillusion, and deep regret. Ellaria and the Sand Snakes finally live up to their lethal reputation, and murder their way into power in a long overdue attempt to make Dorne interesting. Too little, too late! It was a slow way to start the season, but also a promising one. Speaking of Davos, finally someone in the South knows about the shitstorm that's coming north of the Wall.

Roses and Thorns Episode 31 (English dubbed)

And it's a bit of a relief to learn who has been tormenting poor Theon, though it's hard to be thrilled at the prospect of spending more time with Roose Bolton's bastard as he spreads his cruelty from Theon to the rest of the North. Ultimately, though, when the producers split George R. Martin's A Storm of Swords in half — or, rather, split it off roughly two-thirds in — it was nigh impossible for them to manufacture a climax that came anywhere close to the power of the Red Wedding or the previous season finales, for that matter.

So they didn't. This episode felt like it fell where it does in Martin's text — somewhere in the middle. And as for that final tableau, with the mass of Yunkai swarming the benevolent blonde Dany, calling her "mother" and treating her like a savior — not good. Loved the new opening credits , though. The biggest development in this episode — the High Sparrow maneuvering Margaery to bring King Tommen into the fold of the Faith, thereby thwarting the Lannister—Tyrell military confrontation — is a nice bit of storytelling sleight of hand, if rather anticlimactic.

Otherwise, we spend the bulk of the episode getting caught up with a few dangling storylines with some oh-right- that -guy characters: Walder Frey reveals he tossed Edmure Tully in a prison after the Red Wedding, and we first learn the Blackfish has retaken Riverrun, sparking a thousand fruitless Lady Stoneheart theories.

Sam introduces Gilly to his doting mother and tyrannical, bigoted father, then realizes whoops, this was a bad idea! And 53 episodes after his last appearance, Benjen Stark re-emerges in time to save Bran and Meera from the army of wights. Show of hands: Who would have rather tracked his insane journey over the last few seasons instead of wasting all that time in Dorne? Raises hand. It was also infinitely more satisfying than the bizarre interlude at Riverrun. Meanwhile, Tyrion had so little to do in Season 6 — despite running a city while fighting off an insurgency — that his time-killing scenes with Grey Worm and Missandei reach a kind of meta-nadir in this episode.

Casting Jonathan Pryce as the High Sparrow — the pious, barefooted leader of Westeros' cult of fundamentalist religious ascetics — was a particularly savvy decision; he lends a sense of pragmatic gravitas to a man who could have come across as merely a raving fanatic. His introduction is a high point in a decent-if-slow interstitial episode, which also features Margaery consummating her marriage to Tommen and throwing some thorny shade at Cersei, which is what drives the Queen Mother into the High Sparrow's dangerous nest in the first place. But it also points to the chronic problem for all GoT season premieres: While this penultimate season often moved at an uncharacteristic gallop, "Dragonstone" is more of a saunter, deliberatively establishing the conflicts that played out all season.

It was at once a deeply satisfying payoff and a chilling reminder of just how much of a murderous sociopath Arya has become trying clear those names from her list. It almost made up for the jarring presence of Ed Sheeran as a Lannister soldier with a penchant for singing. The decision to open this season premiere with Tywin melting down Ned Stark's ancestral Valyrian steel sword proved to be telling harbinger of the dark and gloomy proceedings for the rest of Season 4. Yes, there is yet more setup in this hour — as Ygritte and the Wildlings advance south, and Dany and the Unsullied march on the slavers of Meereen — but this episode also introduces of one of Game of Thrones ' very best characters, Prince Oberyn Martell of Dorne Pedro Pascal , a bisexual badass with a murderous grudge against the Lannisters.

As was the case in the Season 2 premiere, we end with Arya, this time learning the ways of killing and revenge at the begrudging tutelage of the Hound, in the most delightfully twisted buddy comedy in Westeros. A mixed bag. The Faith Militant are a good idea, but in execution, their reign of terror feels hasty and small, and King's Landing has rarely felt more like a backlot. And whatever the Sand Snakes were supposed to be this season, their underwhelming treatment started here, with Keisha Castle-Hughes, Jessica Henwick, and Rosabell Laurenti Sellers doing their best with the scraps the show seemed to give them.

But this is also the episode in which Ser Barristan valiantly dies while battling with the insurgent Sons of the Harpy, and Stannis delivers a heartwarming proclamation of love and devotion to his only daughter and heir. Yeah, remember that? How much it filled you with unexpectedly warm and cozy feelings for GoT 's most hard-hearted character? We all should have known better.

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More chess pieces are put in place to start off this season. But if I was supposed to feel anything about the death the two Sand Snakes — the one who was in Whale Rider , and, um, the one with the whip — that ship, alas, had not only sailed but had long since sunk into the Narrow Sea. OK, yes, this is also when Dany's silly stolen dragon's story line began, but that barely matters in the face of what happens once King Joffrey's cruelty foments a full-bore riot. See above. It's one of the best of the setup episodes — Tywin is at his most glower-y and Margaery at her most diabolically kind; Dany's dragons are getting big and catching fish on the open sea; and Jon meets a giant!

The reveal that Ser Barristan Selmy has come to serve at Dany's side, meanwhile, is treated with a bit more pomp and circumstance than is probably warranted, since we'd last seen him back in Season 1.

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But it also left many — too many — unanswered questions: Where had Melisandre been? Where did Arya jump from? What of the Azor Ahai prophecy? Each of these setups, however, unfold with an ease, and even a sense of consequence, that earlier season openers have lacked. It's GoT 's most assured season premiere ever — so much so that we're also treated to its very first flashback: A young Cersei, already full of confidence and seething anger, confronts a witch, who predicts, essentially, that she will get everything she wants in life before it shatters into oblivion.

So it's not like Cersei can say she wasn't warned. The sight of Dany standing naked before the Dothraki, as they bow to her while their khals are engulfed in flames, stands as one of the most evocative and iconic images of the entire series. For these two reasons alone, "Book of the Stranger" stands out amid a season that took its sweet time getting started. GoT has made a fetish for its characters taking care to say precisely what they mean as rarely as possible.

So I suppose I should have been thrilled that Sansa, Margaery, Cersei, and Yara all declare their intentions and desires in this episode with a bracing directness. But I just found so little art to their pronouncements, like Benioff and Weiss simply put the character motivation notes from the writers room in the mouths of their characters.

Usually, even when all else fails, the dialogue on this show is memorably pungent; this was a rare, and unfortunate, stumble. This is the episode responsible for the invention of the word "sexposition," thanks to Littlefinger's decision to inexplicably explain his motivations to two of his prostitutes as they practiced their But it also has one of the great character introductions ever on TV: Tywin Lannister dressing down his eldest son while skinning an enormous stag, presaging the death later on of King Robert.

And watching Ned get outplayed by basically everyone around him carried just the right amount dread without tipping off unknowing viewers to what Ned's shortsighted nobility would cost him. This is a grand episode, but Jon Snow's direwolf finding a severed hand isn't quite as exciting as Things really start cooking now, with Robb launching his war against the South, Cersei browbeating Sansa into denouncing her father, and, sadly, Khal Drogo winning a duel that leaves a mortal wound that will ultimately cost him his life.

For most of its run, Game of Thrones was a show about characters. It was abundant in them sometimes overly so! But even at its most self-indulgent or tedious, for its first six seasons, GoT always evinced a keen grasp of the fundamental truth that TV that truly lasts is about spending time with people we love, hate, or otherwise find irreducibly fascinating, week on week, as they shrink from or rise to the challenges before them. For its final two seasons, however, GoT was far more a show about plot and action, about hurtling these characters to Where They Had To Go without spending time to honor who they had become.

For Daenerys, that meant racing her into unearned megalomania and mass murder, so her story could end in the mournful finale with her beloved Jon Snow stabbing her in the heart. Emilia Clarke and Kit Harington gave as much as they could to this tragic climax, and as directors, Benioff and Weiss captured it with some striking visual tableaus. The resolution to just about everything around that narrative, at least, was far more satisfying, in a very GoT -y way.

I was especially glad to see how central Tyrion figured in the finale, given how recessive his character had become; Peter Dinklage finally had something to work with, and he gave a performance rich with the ruefulness, anger, and moxie that has defined Tyrion from the start. This is how you payoff a character's eight-season journey. In the end, though, I think I identified most with Arya. Just one episode after the disaster that was "Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken," GoT employs the threat of rape again as a storytelling device to allow Sam a moment of heroism aided greatly by Ghost that consummates his relationship with Gilly.

Otherwise, however, this episode put Season 5 back on much surer footing. Cersei's shortsighted support of the High Sparrow bites back at her with a vengeance, but not before she's allowed the small victory of seeing Margaery stripped of her finery and dignity. And once again, Benioff and Weiss take a bold step beyond Martin's books by bringing Tyrion and Dany together after Ser Jorah triumphs in the fighting pits. Everything about this episode is fabulous — especially the sight of Brienne fending off a grizzly bear with a wooden sword — except for two scenes.

One: more mystic wheel-spinning with Bran, Jojen, and Osha. And two: two naked women torturing Theon by turning him on, just so the Boy can cut off his The bad: The sudden discovery of Ser Jorah's betrayal of Dany three seasons earlier feels weirdly, needlessly abrupt, as if Benioff and Weiss weren't quite sure how to fit it in this season, so they just tacked it on.

The good: Sansa's brilliant transformation from Cersei's innocent "little dove" into Littlefinger's slippery dream woman. The split decision: The battle between Oberyn and Ser Gregor Clegane, in which the former nearly defeats the latter, until the latter crushes the former's skull like an egg. Yes, the execution of the scene was packed with top-notch tension, and Pascal certainly made the most of Oberyn's blinding need for revenge. But this felt like one cruel storytelling twist too far, not really punishing the characters — none of whom really got to know Oberyn all that well — but the audience — many of whom came to love Oberyn more than they may have expected.

So, Daenerys. She can be ruthless when backed into a corner, and with almost no one left alive from her transformative journey through Essos, I can see how Dany could be pushed to the very edge of her benevolence and fall — tragically — into genocide. I can see it, but the writers never bothered to show it.

There was even time for Tyrion to bid a mournful farewell to Varys, and then Jaime. Just about all the acting in this episode, actually, was superlative, often making meals out of morsels. If only the script had matched them. There is a fine line between satisfying climactic drama and shameless pandering to make fans happy, and this gratifyingly fraught and frustratingly indulgent episode trampled all over it. I mean, my gods, watching Viserion careen through the air and slam into the ice took my breath away. But the haste with which these seven popular, wildly disparate characters were slammed together and thrust beyond The Wall left their interactions feeling shallow instead of richly earned.

And yet I cannot deny how entertaining this episode still was in the moment — especially the human drama between Jon and Dany. Perhaps counterintuitively, I also dug the vexing conflict between Arya and Sansa. As for the frustrating implication that Littlefinger was playing these two siblings for chumps, I never really bought it. It is thrilling to have this dyspeptic knight, and the sour mournfulness with which Rory McCann plays him, back on the show. There are, however, several broken men highlighted in this perfectly fine episode: Theon, who seemed to exist this season only to make his bisexual sister Yara more interesting; Jaime, whose empty bluster does nothing to impress the Blackfish; and even Jon Snow, whose recent resurrection does not aid his attempt to mount an army large enough to take back Winterfell.

They should all take heed of the young and formidable Lady Lyanna Mormont Bella Ramsey , who knows how to command a room with not much more than a wave of her hand. After lurking so long on the sidelines, Littlefinger looms large in this episode, as we learn that the inciting incident that launched the entire series — the death of Jon Arryn — was really his doing, a twist that makes brilliant sense.

Brienne of Tarth

But when did Littlefinger start talking out of the side of his mouth all the time? Does he have a canker sore or something? Also, and this is no small thing: Bran actually does something — warg-ing his way into Hodor's body — that is certifiably cool! And, in hindsight, sadly prophetic of Hodor's ultimate fate! Weiss story.

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Tyrion talks his way out of certain doom at the Eyrie more on that place later , and Ned at long last figures out that it's a wee bit odd that all of King Robert's kids happen to have blonde hair. But this episode is all about Viserys' golden crown. Of all the "shocking" deaths on this show, the fact that Khal Drogo killed his wife's lout of a brother came as no surprise. How he did it, however, was an outstandingly gruesome method of execution. We could talk about Joffrey's staggering sexual cruelty, or the welcome end to Dany's drudgery through the desert, or the beginning of the end of Robb Stark as he meets his beloved Talisa for the first time.

But, really, why would we talk about anything other than Melisandre's smoke baby? Watching an inky black creature emerge from the loins of a suddenly pregnant woman remains one of the most vivid images from the entire show. Like "Blackwater" before it, this is the heretofore rare episode that spends the entire runtime rooted in a single location: Castle Black as it is besieged on both ends by Mance Rayder's army.

The quiet scenes of interaction — like between Sam and Gilly, or Sam and Maester Aemon, or Sam and pretty much anyone — are just as rousing as the epic scenes of battle featuring giants, wooly mammoths, and a massive chain scythe slicing down the wildlings trying to scale the wall. Unlike "Blackwater," however, the buildup to this battle during Season 4 felt too slack, starving it of a necessary feeling of driving anticipation and dread — which may be why Ygritte's death doesn't pack quite the punch that it should.

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